How to Have a Great Night (in any dance-music situation)

Bass blasting my body back and forth, thrashing my way through the throngs of people to the front, I make it to the heart of the action.

The bottom-end punch and the high-end screech tell me not to hold back, so I don't.

Lights lights lights.

"Is he on cocaine?" they ask.

No, bitches, I'm high on these electric beats.

I'm dancing for a cause -- gonna spark a sick dance party. Summoning all my raw energy, I flail my arms higher, I squat lower, I scream louder.

Two songs have passed since I last opened my eyes.

I take a quick look around and...I sparked nothing; people look at me, awkwardly.

It don't matter.

Airplane wings.

Run to the speakers FEEL THE FUCKING BEAT.

Twirl twirl twirl.

Nothing's gonna spoil my night.

***

Walking along Granville Street, my wet t-shirt clings to my body; sweat drips from my beard to the sidewalk. I bask in the revelry of the last three hours.

Tonight's crowd was tame. The magic formula for melting people's faces fizzled out into a whimper on the dancefloor.

This is a common occurence with today's modern, shoegazing concert-go'er.

If you should ever encounter a crowd like this, it is important not to panic -- you can still salvage a damn good night if you follow these simple and easy rules:

     1. Don't give a fuck.


     2. Don't be that annoying person who yells at the shoegazers for
     harshing your buzz. Your good time is not their responsibility.
     Who is responsible for your good time?


     3. You. You alone are responsible for how hard you party. Inspire
     others with your bizarre dancemoves rather than chastizing them
     for ruining the energy.


     4. You have more energy than you think. I know you had a long day.
     Fuck it -- keep going.

     5. Don't give a shit (similar to rule #1).

If we all follow these rules, we can turn this city into a dance mecca.

Let's lose our inhibitions Vancouver.

Party hard. Bring an Aoki attitude to dance shows. Give it your all and look like a damn fool.

Others will join -- or they won't. Either way just dance; make the party happen yourself, even if you're the only one partying.

Be the spark, Vancouver.

Be the catalyst that triggers the next insane dance party that you'll never forget -- even if you're the only one having a good time.

Post some more rules for the dancefloor in the comments section, and if you need some inspiration, then watch this classic video from Sasquatch 2009.